This month so far we have looked at some of our fears, what scares you most when you are alone with your thoughts, and where you might be holding yourself back. We hope you might have chosen to read our book this month (Grit by Angela Duckworth) as she shows us the research behind how we can transcend some of our fears of failure, or maybe the fear of ever even beginning (Hint: it’s having passion, practicing, feeling purposeful and having hope that you can do it.. and bonus points if you have a group to cheer you on.)
All of this is part of why CWC exists. We believe that we all have an inherent desire to dream of improving ourselves and live out our best lives, and yet sometimes we still flounder. Some of the reason can be that we lack skills in one of the above areas (all of which can be learned), or we simply don’t have a gang who either want what we want, or want it for us. In fact, one of the things that Angela speaks of, is that as we are figuring out exactly what we might want to master next, it helps if we have gentle and encouraging mentors who allow us to play and have fun. Which is why we love it when you share your stories of challenges and success with us, and why we think it’s imperative to have a clique.
This month of looking at what scares you will probably have stimulated a bit of introspective thinking about where you might want some help, or what you would love to spend some time working on. Hopefully you are connecting some fun plans for yourself. Always remember we are here with you, cheering you on.
We want you to remember that it is completely normal, and in fact expected, that not only will something new be a little scary, unfortunately, you will probably suck at it. You might even suck for quite a while. The trick is to keep having fun (most of the time) and keep making time for deliberate practice. By deliberate, we mean the kind of effort that is an uncomfortable stretch. Practice that is tiring, probably confronting, and yet is ultimately gratifying. Will it be difficult? Probably. Will it be worth it? Absolutely.
As you are thinking of the next exciting phase of your life, you may notice some of the little creepers that will hold you back. They could be in the form of your thoughts as you talk yourself out of change, or they might come in as sensations in your body, as you get a little uncomfortable. Don’t ignore these- they are clues as to what your blocks will be, and they are also a sign that you are onto something. We know that changes are often called a breakthroughs for a reason. We have to break down some of our little monsters, and to find a way through.
This week we would love you to start to think about what strategies you have used in the past to deal with things that scare you. Consider how you have handled new plans, or things that you found difficult, all the way through to stressful situations, and even your nightmares. You will have had to deal with fears in some way before, so let’s break down what has served you in the past and develop a plan for any little creatures that rear their heads from here on in.
We will chat more about this in the podcast, for but now, have a think on this as you go through this week, and see if you can notice a pattern to your most effective ways to break on through, so you can create new breakthroughs without breaking you.