Last week we asked you to give your inner child a hug (or love or compassion or whatever you needed back then to heal a situation).
We want you to be aware that sometimes when we are thinking about our past hurts, it can be tempting to get into a loop of blame or resentment. When we see ourselves as a child with unmet needs, the people we looked to for guidance (usually parents, but also teachers or older relatives) can be blamed for not providing the support we wanted to negotiate the drama. In order to rise above this sensation and take control as adults we want to recognise something fun..
In our book this month, Chapman noted that psychologists have identified that our basic needs are security, self worth and significance. He also shows us how love is the thing that interfaces with all of these. So the antidote to helping our inner child, is to add a little love.
We also know that sometimes it doesn’t feel that simple. Despite being aware that it’s up to us to heal the hurts of our inner child, we can still want things to be different. We may still have a yearning or a wish deep in our hearts that things didn’t go the way they did. So we want to break that loop and pop back out into the sunshine.
We think something that can interrupt the loop of blame and dismay is play.
The dictionary tells us that play is to engage in an activity for enjoyment and recreation, rather than serious, or for practical purposes. So we suppose what we are talking about is a little different, because of course our play here will have a purpose: the purpose of lightening your heart, and bringing you back to love.
As you know, the way we do one thing is the way we do all things, so if we bring more play into our free time, we have a feeling that playfulness will start to leak over into other areas of our lives. Perhaps play might reinvigorate a staid relationship, or maybe we will find more things to be playful with at work, bringing fun and ease back into our career.
This week, we would love you to go find a way to observe children at play (yes, we know some are still in lockdown, so it might have to be via google at this stage). Once you’ve noticed some kids playing, become an astute observer: look at the way they hold their bodies and how they move, note the expressions on their faces, listen to the tone of their voices, see how they interact with each other, notice the light in their eyes. Without even thinking, we know you will start to model some of these behaviours. Play will permeate your cells, and you’ll find yourself letting your younger and older child giggle.
Who knows, maybe you’ll suck a lollypop, fly a kite or skip down the street?
And why?
Just because.